Finding Joy is a challenge for me. I am not naturally prone to it; I’m more of a melancholy. When I talk about Joy, I’m not doing so as someone who has found the secret to it. In fact, it’s because of my own inability to find Joy that led me to explore why it is eluding me. Why the Joy promised in Scripture seems so foreign to me.
My
problem was my definition of Joy. I thought Joy meant feeling good all
the time. Have you met anyone who feels good all of the time? I don't think that was the plan
"Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have Joy"
(2 Ne. 2:25). The mysterious word there is "might', it has always stood out to me whenever anybody would recite this scripture. Even for those who are naturally upbeat
and optimistic, it's impossible that they live in a constant state of Joy. We live in a world with opposition. There must needs be opposition in all things.
" These two powers have ever existed
and always will exist in all the eternities that are yet to come.
Although in relation to this earth, some time in its future history
there will be no death, and him that hath the power of death will be
destroyed. It is written in the Book of Mormon, “For it must needs be,
that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, righteousness
could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor
misery, neither good nor bad.”
When man is born into the world he is at once subject to the
influences of life and death, and to the innumerable and varied
vicissitudes which he meets in his passage from birth to the grave, to
give him an experience which will prepare him to enter into and enjoy
life everlasting. He is endowed with agency to choose either life or
death, and must abide the consequences in the next life of the choice
which he makes in this. Were it not that evil exists with good, man
could not have been an agent unto himself. When the spirit of man
enters the earthly tabernacle, it is as pure as an angel of God. When
man, as a child, is brought forth to the light, and begins to live,
move, and have a visible and an individual being in this world, he is
brought in contact with the principle of evil—he receives the mark of
sin, and as passes the usual stages from infancy to manhood, he learns
to become disobedient to the requirements of heaven, disobedient to
the laws of man, and disobedient to the laws of his own nature; he
engenders the spirit of hatred, malice, wrath, strife, and all that
class of evils which render him unfit to return again to the presence
of his Father and God; but if he will obey the Gospel and walk in the
ways of the Lord, his mortal existence and his proneness to sin, which
he has inherited through the fall, become profitable and essentially
necessary to the full enjoyment of salvation and eternal life."1
We have to start somewhere realistic when seeking Joy in our lives.
Joy is a feeling of trust that God is in control of all the details of my life, the quiet assurance that everything is going to work out, and the determined choice to look to God in gratitude even when in the dark times of life
In scripture, when looking for a definition of Joy, You’ll find nothing in that definition about happy feelings, because, as we all know, happiness is fleeting and temporary.
We tend to think that life comes like a roller coaster up and down steep slopes. Sometimes topsy turvy and zooming round and round. In reality, it’s much more like train tracks. Every day of your life, we experience good, pleasant pleasurable, and lovely things. We don't always see them. At the exact same time, sorrow, disappointment, hurt can cause us pain. These two tracks — both Joy and disappointment — run parallel to each other every single second of your life.
That’s why, when you’re in the midst of an amazing experience, you have a nagging realization that it’s not perfect. And while you’re experiencing something awful, there’s this nagging feeling, that turns into hope, it's a realization that there is still something good to be found. They’re inseparable.
I was able to go to my follow up appointment with my doctor this week. We went over the results of the MRI. We concluded that we will wait and watch the 5 mm lesion I nick-named "Trouble" instead of doing an invasive biopsy. I felt a sense of calm come over me. I felt I had pursued the right coarse of action. He ordered me to have another mammogram and MRI in June to see if there is any growth or change. I will also continue to be vigilant in self checks to watch for changes, as I encourage all women to do.Although this has felt like a lot of opposition for me, I know I will look back and see where the tracks converged of good and bad experiences to teach me and motivate me toward something better in my life. It really is about perspective. I love my joy journey. I love sharing it with you. I want us all to get there.
There is always two tracks one of happy times and one of unpleasant times.If you look down these two tracks, you will discover they merge into one narrow way. One day you will look back on your life experience like it was almost a dream. It will present itself to you again only from a different perspective. I watched home movies recently with my children. I realized so much was happening around me in the movies that at the time I did not perceive. I was living in my own mind and perspective. I was blinded by my own interpretation of my experience. Now watching these movies brought a new perspective. I saw myself different than I had imagined I was at that time in my life. It left me kind of feeling disturbed. Like I live a lie about myself walking around blinded by my perception. Like I am not who I think I am. how upsetting and unsettling this was. yet it was very enlightening to me. A miracle really. I realize now I will someday look back and see two tracks converge, they will make sense. My whole experience in life will become more complete. I will see I needed the times of grief as much as I needed the times of Joy. I will see that moments of Joy and sorrow were really just guideposts to let me know I was on the right track or wrong track to get to my final destination. Joy is not the destination. It is the reminder, the guide if you will. A reminder where you came for, a longing to return there. C.S. Lewis explains it perfectly:
“It (JOY) was valuable only as a pointer to something other and outer. While that other was in doubt, the pointer naturally loomed large in my thoughts. When we are lost in the woods the sight of a signpost is a great matter. He who first sees it cries, “Look!” The whole party gathers round and stares. But when we have found the road and are passing signposts every few miles, we shall not stop and stare.” –C.S. Lewis
"The Savior came into this world, according to his own statement, to give us life more abundantly (John 10:10)—in other words, that we might have Joy, an abundance of Joy, a continuance of Joy. Thus it is essential that we follow the pathway which the Son of Man marked out for us if we are to receive that abundant life which is a fullness of Joy.
We must learn to love the Lord our God with all of our hearts, might, mind, and strength (Matt. 22:37-38). We must abide by that Golden Rule (Matt. 7:12) and learn to love our neighbors as ourselves (Matt. 22:39). In this way, and in this way only, shall we have a fullness of Joy. There is no other road.
The night before the Savior's crucifixion, he said to his Apostles, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you" (John 14:27). It is the peace that comes through the Spirit of Jesus Christ; it is the light of Christ that enters into our hearts, that gives us a Joy—as the prophets have proclaimed—"... which passeth all understanding" (Philip. 4:7).
Also, in addition to the Spirit of Christ, we have received the Holy Ghost, a Comforter, to comfort us in time of distress. This Comforter brings a Godly peace into our hearts."2
“All Joy reminds. It is never a possession, always a desire for something longer ago or further away or still “about to be.” -C.S. Lewis
I now look at Joy different than before. I understand more fully what CS. Lewis was trying to say. Recently, since my study of Joy began, I started cherishing those fleeting moments of Joy, and the longing that it entails. I am now reminded by Joy I am on the right track, the signpost is clear. I know where I came from, and I know where I am going ( both topics for another post). What I don't know, just like everybody else, is when I am going.Life is fragile. We are like a flower... here today and gone tomorrow.What has settled peacefully on my soul is something soul stirring and deep. I know that the ultimate destination, the feeling and pleasure of arrival there, will surpass even how Joy can feel.
Life Coach
Tiffany King
TheEmpoweringGift@gmail.com